I’m worried about my girlish figure. These scales are so scarry.
I heard it on the news, so it must be true: The average American gains one pound during the period beginning with Thanksgiving and ending with New Years Day. I just ate the rest of Emily’s dressing.
Here goes. What! I gained three pounds. That’s about half my weight!
Oh, I’ve gotta take a nap
Get out of there Lucky Dawg, while you still have a chance!