How to reverse a lousy life


  1. Mama said there would be days like this. 

  2. I bet you’ve had them too – the toilet is clogged, the dog just barfed up pieces of your favorite hair brush, and the humidity makes your hair look like you stuck your finger in a light socket.

  3. Here are some suggestions on how to break  the chain of unhappy events and restart your day.

  1. Find a cause. There are so many good causes looking for a few good women. You don’t have to try to save the planet, maybe just give the local library some books, or investigate other causes and see which ones could make a  difference.

  2. Start your own biography. It will make you feel like your life is important enough to document.

  3. Buy a new designer handbag and stock with fresh necessities – this always works for me.

  4. Write to the white house. They send you back a form letter, but it’s a letter from the white House, so who cares.

  5. Rescue a dog or cat from the city pound. This is self-explanatory and you will have a friend for life which you will treasure until he chews up your hair brush. If you are way too uptight, put out a squirrel or bird feeder.

  6. Memorize three proverbs in three different languages, and then tell your friends, "well, in Italy they say “Que Sera sera” or when when you see someone getting their just desserts say "Pan bog paczy" which is polish for “god is watching and you got what you deserve (usually something bad, like typhus.)”



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