Good bye Colonel
After reviewing the finalists for the Ole Miss Rebels’ new on-field mascot, I had to refrain from regurgitating. At first I thought it was a joke, but apparently more than 13,000 students and alums voted and the field of possibilities has been narrowed to five.
I won’t even get into what a disgrace it is that” they” (who is “they” anyway?) made the decision to ban Colonel Rebel from the field.
But, no point in looking back. Personally I would rather not have a mascot at all, than to settle for one of these lame brain ideas.
And the finalists are….
1. A Horse:
This mascot makes zero sense. Besides, Colonel Rebel rode a horse, so it would probably be banned as well in another decade.
2. Hotty and Toddy:
I thought this was a joke perpetrated by my MSU friends, but NEEEEEEEEEWW, it is for real, and even seems to be a front runner! The idea is to have two muppet-like characters roaming around the sidelines.
3. A Lion:
This makes as much sense as the horse. Have you seen any lions in Mississippi lately.
4. A Bear:
I heard they discovered a black bear down around Meridian last year.
Well, whoopee do, let’s make him our mascot. What are they smokin’ up there in Oxpatch?
5. A Shark:
Now this makes a little more sense for a school which graduates the majority of our lawyers.
Having said all this I have the perfect mascot. I’m trying to pull together an artist’s rendering. Hold your breath – I will post it later today. But I think it’s perfect and will offend no one.