Vodka: Maybe it wasn’t meant to be drunk!

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Vodka has a long history of use as medicine, having been sold by druggists to cure everything from infertility to colic, not to mention the plague in the Middle Ages.

While some of those historic promoters were misled, it’s true that vodka has a wide range of potential uses beyond serving as a relaxer and social lubricant.

Why would you want to do anything else with vodka but drink it? It is widely available, effective and less toxic than many of the chemical alternatives you might use for these tasks according to my friend, Linda, from Hattiesburg who sent me this information.

Seew….you’re telling me we can all consume more vodka and live green?  (To the gills, maybe.) But here are the claims:

1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka.  The stuff dissolves adhesive – which makes me wonder what it does to the throat.  Better yet, I guess you could take a big swig before ripping off the bandage and you probably won’t feel a thing.

2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill a trigger-spray bottle with vodka, spray the area and let set five minutes.  Wash clean.  The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew.  (I wonder if anyone has tried to kill cancer cells with it.)

3. To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a soft clean cloth dampened with vodka.  The alcohol cleans the glass and kills the germs.  (I’m off to the store to buy a bottle of cheap vodka.  I have 25 pairs of reading glasses I can’t see through.)

4. Spray vodka on wine stains, scrub with a brush and blot dry. (To me, using alcohol to clean up alcohol doesn’t compute.)

5. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to cleanse the skin and tighten the pores. ( But your friends and co-workers will probably wonder if you’ve been nipping again before noon!)

use-vodka-lush-hair-lg 6. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo.  The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes  toxins from hair and stimulates the growth of healthy hair.  (I’m not sure I believe this one – think it could be a Russian ploy to sell more vodka.)

7.  Fill a 16-ounce trigger spray bottle with vodka and spray bees or wasps to kill them.  I guess the advantage over traditional bug spray here is that the insects will die in a giddy state.

8. Pour vodka over an area of skin affected by poison ivy to remove the oil from your skin.

9. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain.  (This probably only works if you actually swallow it.)

10. Mix vodka, sugar and water and pour in a vase to keep your aging flowers looking fresh.

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