There is nothing still in working order in my home. The central heat went out last month – good riddance. I no longer have to worry about hot flashes.
This morning after I got out of my bath, I heard gurgling in my kitchen sink – clear across the house.
Oh gee. The plumbing was backed up again, which happens about every four years in an old neighborhood with big trees like mine.
I called Bob, my trusty plumber, who can solve any situation. I didn’t hear from him. When I washed a load of clothes, water came bubbling up in my shower! Time to panic since I have a ton of company heading this way.
I made a few calls and came up with the name, William Campbell. That seemed prophetic since I graduated from high school with a William Campbell. I hope this man would be as honest.
He came and crawled up under the house and guess who showed up at my back door – Bob, my real plumber. He saw that I was cheating on him. But he still stopped by to make sure this new whipper-snapper understood plumbing in an old neighborhood.
He seemed concerned when the kid said he was going to remove the toilet in my guest bath to get to the problem.
He told me to call him after Christmas, like he knew nothing would be resolved. Right now there is drilling and hammering going on in the guest bath. Mud is everywhere. I can still pull it together by Christmas Eve. Right?
Please, Lord. Help this young man figure out how to be a plumber like Bob.
Emily, I’m sorry I’m not next door to help! I once had a major disaster with plumbing one hours before 20 were expected for dinner. I’ll tell you about it some time.. it was really ugly and involved turnip greens, so it smelled too. Have Merry Christmas and a great 2012!
Kick the kid out, apologize to Bob and promise to never cheat on him again. You cougars are pathetic. Your steadies don’t have to call. You need help, we show up.